“I took her love at seventeen”

This Saturday is finally going to happen. It'll be another dream stolen from me and it will turn into a real life moment. I know I won't learn how to grasp it until I see it before my eyes. My heart tells me I should be jumping around doing cartwheels, really exploding because it's how I feel inside. But I think I'll be just fine. All I know is this night will be significant for me, more than any other show in the entire world. I hope it's everything I picture it to be. I had a nervous breakdown over it this past week..It's so funny how my emotions take over me during the most important times of life! It scares me. My brothers started laughing at me of course and I couldn't help to laugh at my own self haha. I didn't mean to cry in front of them or my mom. I just couldn't hold it in no longer.

Today I got my Julia's birthday package in the mail. It made me feel really sentimental all of a sudden and I felt good. I miss seeing the beauty in things. I've just been so caught up in the ugliness that now I'm letting it all come back. If that makes sense. I'm just glad I got myself back to normal just in time for Saturday. Julia's package included my mixed tape, Polaroid film, The US of Leland DVD, the Transatlanticism album, Ace's signed poster, the most treasure notebook of all time that includes excerpts off the mixed tape, a note, an older fray sticker that Rod sent to her with his camera. I love all of it so much with a passion.

Saturday for those who don't know, is The Fray, Meese, Jack's Mannequin concert all rolled into one. AKA THE TIME. OF. MY. LIFE.

"He was like a sleeping elephant.
You can do whatever you want around a sleeping elephant; whatever you want.
But when he wakes up, he tramples everything."