Miss California

i like saturdays and the rocket summer. blue skies and the morning's air. i like you, you like me. there's something wrong with this picture. let's turn it upside down so we can see. the insecurities caused by the last four years of economic downsizing in the eastern us. i like february along with tilly and the wall. pretty pictures and shirts that are too small. for my child-like figure that you're so in love with. i like the autumn's leaves and bright eyes. eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. stands strong in my favorites of all time. along with you and your technicolor eyes. you say johnny cash is your favorite singer. but you've never heard folsom prison blues. how do you expect me to believe you. i was never much on country songs but. someone should really tell you to come home. 'cause it's getting (awfully) late. and your dinner's getting cold. i like simple songs with pretty words. i tried poetry, but it's just no good. the pages get lost, besides i'd much rather sing to you. i love living life with you by my side. you're a smart kid with a beautiful smile. and oh god those technicolor eyes. i like saturdays and the rocket summer. night skies and that lovely stare. i like you, you like me. so lets lock all the doors. there's nothing outside we need to see. 'cause we've got love. yeah we've got a tv we can watch "Friends" all we want. and we can laugh at how i laugh like Ross when i get nervous. and we don't have to worry about tomorrow. because we know it's gonna come. whether we want it to or not

sunday drive

But here's a thanks for a summer I'll always remember.


ice cream sandwiches, going swimming, eating fajitas, watching boxing matches, wasting polaroids, missing someone, work work work

your the only good thing that keeps me hanging on.

this is odd for me. i dont understand. maybe i'm paranoid. i think i'm gonna end up shopping by myself. and going to the wedding by myself. i'll just go and ask my mom to take me to get my stuff from your house tomorrow. and then thats it

its easy if you try

I almost forgot how much I love John Lennon. I've been watching all his documentaries saved on my dvr. all day. I could've been hanging out with anna but I guess she has other things going on. she thinks I'm angry at her

I work tomorrow. its depressing but at least I earn money. no film today, i'm upset. I don't even know if San Fran is going to happen. I think my parents are ok with it but I honestly dont think its gonna happen. August 6th will be here and it'll go by just like any other day.
i need to stop making plans. I dont want to get so ahead of myself especially when it isn't ever going to happen. i hope she goes so I can go. I don't think she realizes how much i love hanging out with her. it makes me tear up

i shouldn't force things. it looks bad on my part

the distance destoys who I am

He always gets so mad things you laugh at.
"Don't get so worked up" you'd say. But on the
back deck you admit that you haven't felt much
like laughing lately anyway. And so I say, "that
could change."

I noticed how you waste no time making your way
across the room. You leave a wake of tongues
still waving after you. And it isn't no coincidence
where you finally choose to stand. I guess soon
you will be leaving your man.

It's a sweet smile and then a denial. Hey, you
are just trying to be nice. But there is a meaning
to every fleeting action you unconsciously
decide. The clocks they chime. Now it's time.

I know you try and play it cool but there are
some thoughts you just can't hide. Only in your
closest friends do you confide. The way you say
you'll be seeing me, oh like it's so offhand. I
guess soon you will be leaving your man.

You stare at me so boldly now. You have no lack
of confidence. It's just those lessons on sublety
you missed. I know you dream of saving me
like I'm some plane that you could land. But
when you fly you'll be leaving your man.


16 more days for San Fran anna. just sixteen

oh I believe in yesterday

issac
Originally uploaded by wilshireblvd [circa1983]

that picture is perfect. Yesterday you wouldn't believe what happened. I saw my old best friend's dad and brothers and niece. I would always see them together. I was at work and i was trying to get by so her dad said excuse me. we both looked up and we locked eyes and just knew. I swear I felt so relief. I saw Miranda and I hadn't seen her in three years. She was so beautiful. her eyes always shined so bright. I didn't know whether to ask him If he remembered me or anything. I should have said something. Its funny because, i promise to you the other week I kept thinking about her and all our sleepovers and moments we shared and I missed her soo much. She disappeared out of my life just like that and I was worried about her. I think it was kind of a sign for me. That she was ok and even If I didn't get the chance to see her, I know at least her family are doing great. They looked happy

hi

hi

anna will be here in 4 HOURS

ahhh. i can't wait i can't wait i can't waitt

i'm gonna go get ready. i'm so happy i'm seeing her todayyyy. she's dropping me off my present. i'm excited to see what this whole talk was about

i saw the best movie in my entire life today. i love it? i might watch again tonight over and over and over. because i do that with movies i'm in love with.

and i might go to San Fran? yeah omg holy shit
i'm keeping my fingers crossed

photographs

A Writing from the Skateboard Mag
words by Steve Berra
page 065

Photographs are fascinating.
They show us how things were while subsequently telling us they aren’t that way anymore.
They tell us everything in the past tense.
They tell us we were younger.
They tell us we were skinnier, fatter, hairier, uglier, prettier, more alive, or more dead than now.
They tell us what cars we drove, what friends we have, what clothes we wore, what tricks we did on what, and where we were when we did them.
They tell us how embarrassing, frustrating, saddening, and exhilarating life was or wasn’t for us at the time.
They tell us that everything we’re looking at in a photograph is different than it used to be, and that its an empirical fact that nothing remains exactly the same forever.

That’s what’s fascinating about a photograph; it can serve as kind of a yardstick for progression or digression.
You can look at one of yourself and ask, ”Have I changed for better or for worse since this[photo] was taken? Have I been a good friend or haven’t I? Have I done my job well or have I not?”

Regardless of what the answer is, you can always change, because nothing in this universe stays exactly the same forever, including yourself.