"I cant remember the last thing that you said as you were leaven Now the days go by so fast"

"I cant remember all the times I tried to tell my myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass"

"See the lonely boy out on the weekend..."

These days are going by swimmingly. Especially since July 25th is just around the corner. I think that's a good thing. I know it's a good thingg. I haven't written in ages so I'll just say this. I met this handsome fellow with daring colorful eyes and we're just starting to talk and i don't get how all of a sudden I agreed to have a relationship with him. Because that's what it seems like to him. This is where I'm starting to believe I have commitment issues with guys. I really do think I'm straying my self from being in a relationship. I don't know what's wrong with me. He is too much and I don't deserve him. I just think I haven't found the right one. I am so stupid. So there's that. I guess you have that. I really do hope july 25th is everything like how I imagine it to be. I really do need it. More than anyone can understand right now.

sail away sail away sail away

Hope everyone had a *SPARKLY* 4th! <3 My favorite people at the moment.

We both know it's going to be another long winter
The kind that freezes shut the doors of early spring
But I'll still let you in.
When I hear you knocking, with a whisper
I'll open the doors and I'll let you in
Depressing things are empty beds and lonely dinners
And women who are middle aged with naked fingers
I'll buy myself a ring
To symbolize this marriage every time I break the laws to let you in
Cause nothing's worse than seeing you worse than me
And nothing hurts like seeing you hurt like me
The consequence is less than the happiness you bring to me
There's more to give than what you take from me
Cause nothing's worse than seeing you worse than me
And nothing hurts like seeing you hurt like me
The consequence is less than the happiness you bring to me
There's more to give than what you take from me
Believe in the things that you know
Believe in the things that you know
Sunshine, throw a starving man a piece of bread
All I said, I didn't mean
The chill is strong and nothing seems
To thaw the icy sentiment
Of love that's gone once winter's spent

For the record, NEW MEESE ALBUM COMES OUT TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am at lost for words. **SPOILERS** The entire NEW album is up on their myspace as of YESTERDAY. I can't even begin to take it all in. They released more dates with Barcelona after this small tour with The Fray. SO after I see them in JULY, they come back again in AUGUST?? Yeah, ridonkulous if you ask me. Broadcast sounds so purrrty and Taking The World On is just **sigh** I can't even tell you. I can't wait for when I see them live for the first time. I'm trying to remember all the new lyrics by memory. SEEING HOW THERE'S SO MANY OF THEM IDK YET!! They remind me of a flower. I have gradually watched them bloom and grow so tall. Everyone should go take a listen to the new album before it's released tomorrow. They are putting on a free performance at twist n shout tomorrow in Denver. So psyched to hear about that. WOO

weeping willow won't you wallow louder

I'm a shake you off though
Get up on that horse and
Ride into the sunset
Look back with no remorse

It's bizarre how things for me have been as of lately. I keep trying to figure out what piece is missing in my puzzle. And if there's something I should be doing to find it. This whole year has just been a blurry haze. Do you ever feel that way? For me it's almost to unreal to bare. Slow walking on my way down and then I start to feel less alive. Like maybe all I need is an adrenaline run to something more exquisite than this. a hopeless reason I keep blabbering on about month after month. I've been ready for it a while now. Which is so stupid of me because I'm getting tired of waiting! I need shows. and film. and a car. and new jeans. and inspiration all the time. But that's not it. At least the brighter side is hitting me day by day. I get to witness Meese and The Fray and Jack's Mannequin all on the same stage two months from now. Rachel and I are getting close. so close. ever close. I'm getting my camera soon. Julia is sending me goodies in the mail. My legs are getting pretty..

"These heights get eerie after awhile. I want to go down, way down, far, far, down to the ocean.
That sounds right. Where the waves roll in slowly and there's always a roar and you can't fall anywhere. You're already there."

I have a new desktop background thanks to Rod Blackhurst, Cinematographer + Photographer of The Fray. It's sensational..

now that it's June,
we'll sleep out in the garden..
and if it rains we'll just sink into the mud.